Friday, November 22, 2013

The Love Language of Touch

(Below are Nicole's thoughts on Chapter 2 of The Five Love Languages of Children by Gary Chapman & Ross Campbell, M.D.  Please keep in mind that these are the things that impacted us the most.  We encourage you to read the entire chapter yourself and share what you've learned from the study as well.  Please share in the comment section below the post.)

In Chapter 2:  Love Language #1: Physical Touch, we learn about the first love language, touch.  Some of us are huggers, some of us are hand holders, some of us constantly pat our children on their heads or play with their hair.  Some of us are not fans of physical touch.  However, our children may be craving that motherly/fatherly touch from us.  This could be their love language.

My sons are 11.  My son with autism loves to wrestle.  He loves hugs.  He loves high fives.  He loves to snuggle.  His love language of touch is definitely high up on the love language scale.  My other son, does not like hugs.  He isn't one for high fives.  He will not snuggle or even sit close to us.  This love language is definitely low on his love language scale.  However, they both still need to feel this love language.

This past week, I've been trying to incorporate this love language into both of my sons' days.  For my son with autism, it was easy to do.  We wrestled, gave high fives, sat together and read books.   For my son who doesn't like hugs, it was a little more challenging.  I would sit next to him and put my arm around him while talking.  While he was on the computer, I stood behind him and put my hands resting on his shoulders.  Just for a few seconds.  Just to show him this love language.  It was a little more challenging to do.  You know your child.  You know what is too overwhelming for them.

I love how the authors included the following in this chapter on the love language of touch:

"In the first century A.D., the Hebrews living in Palestine brought their children to Jesus "to have him touch them."  The writer Mark reported that the disciples of Jesus rebuked the parents, thinking their teacher was too busy with "important" matters to spend time on children.  But Jesus was indignant with his disciples.  'Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.  I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.'  And he took the children in his arms, put his hands on them and blessed them."

If you haven't done so already, please pick up your copy of The Five Love Languages of Children and read Chapter 2 to learn more on the love language of touch.  There is a lot more information on this love language and what you can do to show your child this love language.

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